Kevin Hart tight vest beef! Marlon Wayans & Kevin call each other racist names like Monkey and chimp over gay 90's R&B singer style shirt!
Welcome to black history month, 2015!
What happens when you put two 40 something year old, immature, black men with too much money and too little brain on the internet? They call each other racist names like monkey and chimp of course!
You know, I just had a couple of conversations recently with two different family members about how Kevin Hart is so not funny, and for lack of a better term, a "coon"! Excuse my French, it's just, Kevin will do or say just about anything to get that almighty dollar.
He is one of the Kings of Stereotypes, and one of the kings of Anti Comedy! Because he's not only not funny, it's as if he tries to tell bad jokes a gimmick! Oh well, he's the jester of comedy, and he had to find something he could be good or great at. And being a 100% buffoon is Kevin Hart's purpose on Earth! I'm sure of it. Kevin Hart is the disappointment that keeps on disapointing!
With that said, the controversy all started when Kevin posted a picture of himself on Instagram, throwing up his Masonic hand symbol, and wearing an ugly mess of a vest.
Fellow comedian Marlon Wayan's, re-posted the picture on his Instagram page and said the following.
"Dear
Kev, I wanna start by saying that I love you like family, I'm so
fucking proud of your accomplishments but nigga take that tight ass vest
off. It looks like you stole it off my GI JOE action figure. You look
like the lil chimpanzee Ceasar from planet of the apes movie all geared
up for war against man kind. That vest is so tight your chest is
screaming "nooooooooooo"! (*in my @kevinhart4real
voice.) first glance I thought the midget from the penitentiary movies
graced the cover of vogue. Then I thought maybe one of my turds in this
mornings shit stole my Barneys card and went on a shopping spree. I
don't know what look you going for brah, a sexy milk dud? A swagged out
junior mint? A GQ sugar baby? You need friends dawg. Nobody loves you. I
want you to slap Harry, wayne, spank, naim and the pilot of your jet in
the face with a wet hand. This look like the chocolate dropper version
of the Get Rich or Die Tryin album cover. #nobodylovesyou#startedfromthebottomwhyareyouhere#howmanypushupsdidyoudobeforethis#stopthemadness#calltheaccountantfreezethecardsthisniggaisspirituallymaxedout#igotafaceliketheballstombradytooktheairoutofwasfunnyasfuck"
Okay, so Marlon may be funny. But this shit right here was extra boring and extremely racist.
Chimpanzee and Planet of The Apes jokes are expected at a KKK rally.
It's these guys job to be funny for a living. Not imitate their master!!
So, after Marlon's jokes sank like Bobbi Kristina!
Kevin posted this photo of Marlon Wayan's and said,
"Y'all done fucked up.... My first victim is @marlonwayans
....Your face looks like one of the Footballs that Tom Brady let the
air out of. You could of played "Whitney Houston" in her Biopic....If a
"Black & Mild" cigar came to life it would look like you....Lick
your lips before you take a picture this close!!!! Why do u have 3
different grades of hair on your face???? You look like a monkey that
the government runs test on!!!! What's that WHITE shit in the corner of
your mouth??? Wipe your corners at all time....your the "Wayan" that the
family is ashamed of....they have meetings about you behind your
back!!! You look like a Lenny kravitz starter Kit!!!! Boooooom
Bittttccchhhhh ....@meekmill & @champagnepapi & @lilduval are fucking next!!!! Be afraid #ThisIsWhatiDo#WarHasBeenDeclared"
So, both of them have primate jokes?
Neither one of these "funny" men could think of something funnier, and more original to say?
But the racism and self hatred didn't end there! It gets way worse!
Marlon's final message to Kevin was the rusty nail in the midgets coffin!
Marlon posted a topless photo of Kevin Hart with the following caption!
"Yo @kevinhart4real
I was merely offering you brotherly advice about your tight ass
Battlestar Galactica vest. But since you wanna "call me out" I'd like to
address this photo as well. Put your shirt on. It's disturbing. You
look like Bushwick Bill got his eye fixed. There's a weird shape
happening here it's like Boris Kodjoe's body on Emmanuel Lewis' height.
You got a body like a drunk middle aged football coach. All the oil in
the world ain't gonna bring them lower abs in. You got abs like Kenya
Moore. Go sit yo lil California Raisin ass down and put a shirt on. Got
the nerve to have tattoos on yo black ass, we can't read them nigga all
we see is raised skin. .. You gotta feel them shits like braille to know
what the fuck they say. I didn't know they made nike sport wear for
midget tossing ... When did that shit become a sport? #idothistookev#fourfeetsixiseasytocutup#idtakethisfunnybodyoverthatuglyassvestanyday"
Did he really say his skin makes him look like a California raisin?
And did he really say tattoos look like raised skin on his dark skin tone?
Geez! With racist comments like this, who needs to Ku Klux Klan!
Welcome to black history month 2015!
I have a feeling February 2015 will be a coonapocalypse!
If this is what the "brothers" are doing on the first of February, imagine what the rest of the month has in store!
