Love and Hip Hop | New York | Season 4 | Episode 9 | Love is a Battlefield | recap | review | opinion

Love and Hip Hop | New York | Season 4 | Episode 9 | Love is a Battlefield | recap | review | opinion

The episode begins at Barnyard and Carriage house in Totawa New Jersey with Amina Buddafly having a chat with her friend Nicole. Both ladies are looking extra lovely might I add!

Anyway, Amina is telling Nicole all about the mess that happened the last episode in the studio. Come to find out, Amina threw her wedding ring away! Why? Because she was pissed off and so drunk that she peed a little! In her pants! So, freeloader Nicole was like, "bitch, you could have given that shit to me!"

Then Amina tells her to chill the out! Calm de fuck down, and let her finish!

She then let Nicole know  that even though the dick is fantastic, she really needs to leave this bum! And implies that she needs a new manager as well! So Nicole might be managing her soon! Who knows! l have to stay tuned to find out.


The best part of this scene is Amina is having an overbite orgasm! I mean, her mouth is contracting big time as she talks! A lot of people make fun of her for her overbite. But I wont! She has a long head, a long neck and an overbite, that's deep throat city! And chicks who have over bites just had more practice sucking.
So don't hate!



In our next scene we visit Ripley -Grier Studio in Hells Kitchen New York City!
And Tahiry, and her 2 sisters, Lexie and Genie in a bottle, are whoring it up big time at a dance class, centered around shaking their asses. Seems like whenever women get together, something whorish has to go down for it to be considered, "fun".

Come to find out, Tahiry and Lexie sent their broke daddy some money finally. Lord knows that sleeping in a box with Peter was getting to him! It's January 2014, and that polar vortex has taken over 20 lives already! Thanks girls!

Anyway! Tahiry is crying to her sisters about Joe Budden and how she needs to stay away from him, but his "circles" game is just too tight! And then she starts talking dumb fast and I couldn't understand her. She was talking like a Hispanic Hurricane. We all know how they talk! They need to cut that out! Goya O'boya!
I mean, she should either do auctions, or at least offer her fast mouth to Erica Mena.

Anyway, she claims that she's done with Joe Budden, and her sisters know that she is full of more shit that Peter's toes!  In fact, some guy in a black suit from the NSA who was spying on them came by and told her to stop talking about Budden! Yup! Even the Government is tired of hearing about him!

My favorite parts of this scene were #1 the facial expressions that everyone was making, and of course that fine ass Genie, with her pretty hair, pretty face and delicious body! My least favorite part was Lexies fucked up hair do! She had the nerve to sit her big ass up there looking like a Puerto Rican pineapple! I almost changed the channel! Lord Jesus!

In the next scene, it's time to catch up with the Captain of the creeps! Peter Gunz! He is having a chat with Tara at the Gorilla Cafe in Brooklyn. Come to find out, to no ones surprise, she changed the locks on Peter! The worst news is that she has been keeping him away from his children and the pussy, as a temporary punishment!

And the fans call her the classy one?

Peter lets her know that if he has to, he can just climb in a window, or  down the chimney! She looked at Peter and said, "nigga you're not Santa Clause! Fuck you and your elf looking wife!"

Nah, she didn't say that shit! The show would actually be entertaining if she did! But seriously, if Peter keeps creeping around in peoples houses, one of these days he will be mistaken for a burglar! He'll go from Peter Gunz, to Peter gunned down!

Anyway! Tara lets Peter know that she needs to move.
 Instead of keeping it 100 real and factual, she makes it seem as if the relationship problems that are going on with them is why she is moving.

In reality,  she's tired of her slum Lord, and sick of coming home from her job to find that Peter and the boys don made a new snow man out of dirt in the living room! She's ready to go !

She's gonna take the money that she's making from the show, and get a bigger shoe to live in! She tired of living in that dirty little hole, in sin. If she wanted to spend the rest of her life in a dirty little hole in sin, she'd die and reincarnate as the Popes penis! (Now that one was hard to get out! Pun intended)

Anyway, Peter is so desperate to not separate from Tara, probably because she'd destroy him if he had to pay child support for those two kids. He's so desperate to keep Tara around that he committed the ultimate sin in his world. He snitched on himself! He flat out told Tara that yes, he is trying to have his cake and eat it too! Yes! He's that desperate, that he actually told her that he is trying to keep  both Amina and Tara in his life!

And we all know that sooner or sooner, she'll be sucking and fucking with Peter again in no time! This little "break" wont last longer than a Kardashian marriage. Guaranteed!

In the next scene We visit, Shelter Studios in Midtown New York City. Tara is enjoying her birthday present from Yandy! A chance to audition for Yandy's movie. And in the audition, she is pretending to be a drunk woman on a couch with a man, and the couple are about to fuck! Now where did I see this before? Oh yeah! Tara and Peter, in the scene were he talked her into letting him give her the "circles". Pretty much the same scenario!

In this scene, Tara is showing us how much of a bad actress that she is. The only thing flatter than her acting is her ass! And them little flap jack titties almost popped out of shirt when she fell unto the floor with the male actor she auditioned with! Too bad that taking all of those pills left her with no eggs to go with them pancake titties, and syrup discharge oozing from her sizzling snatch!
Whose hungry?


In our next scene, we visit the Engine Room (studio) in the Financial District of New York City!

Erica Mena and Cyn Santana sit down to hear this terrible song. I mean, an abortion to my ears! That Erica is gonna make a fool of herself with. And Cyn is pretending to like it because if she admits that it's garbage, Erica will stop smothering her cho cha with Chipotle! I love how when Cyn is listening to the track, she is moving her foot on the floor. Trying to make it look like she is getting into that wack ass beat! She is on her toe and turning her fat foot back and forth!  In reality, she was just putting out a cigarette!

So, Erica finally admits to kissing Rich and Cyn goes crazy! She tells Erica that she just has to laugh about it because if she doesn't, she'll explode! And cleaning up beans and rice on TV would make them stereotypical Latina maids! And she doesn't do stereotypes!

Smart girl Cyn!

I love how she claims to just have to laugh about it, and she isn't even laughing. She reminds me of when you converse with an idiot who spends too much time on the internet. And in the middle of a conversation, instead of laughing, they say, "lol"! Yeah, crazy world we live in!

So, Erica lies to Cyn and claims that she is over Rich! Cyn may be young, but she surely isn't dumb! She knows that Erica is crazy ass big mouthed liar.

So, with perfect timing. In the middle of their conversation. Rich pops up wearing his sunglasses at night. And he tells Cyn that he merely leant Erica to Cyn!W ow! He really does believe he owns her! Rich has no remorse for kissing Cyn's girlfriend. And is not concerned with her feelings what so ever!  This drove Cyn crazy! Cyn and Rich argued like two insane people, over that bag of shit named Erica Mena!

And Erica let Rich know flat out that he doesn't fight for her the way that Cyn does!

Which is funny to me, because relationships and life in general is not about fighting. It's about working harmoniously with people. Hopefully someday Erica will learn that. But I doubt it! She'll probably be some old crazy bitch in a padded room fighting herself. Or a hoarder burred in cats and bootlegged designer bags!
In debt for for her serial plastic surgeries and drug addiction! Hopefully Erica will pick Meth as a drug of choice! Then we'll see what she looks like in the inside!

The best part of this scene was Erica Mena's  vein covered map looking forehead! Erica's forehead has more lines than Black Friday! How are you gonna scrunch your face up like that? Looking like a leaf! Old Klingon forehead having bitch! Looking like whoref, yes! The whore version of Worf! From Star Trek! I've heard people say that she looks like Cyn, but nah, she looks like a Deep Space Dominican Klingon! Nasty nympho! She should just do porn and get it over with. Hell, Tila Tequila just got backdoored and swallowed! So, take a hint Erica, now is the time to use your true life skills.


Now were off to pay a visit  Saigon's Barbie sized Apartment at Nanuet New York. So, Dr Jekyll and Mr. Hike, as in Hike a bag across a parking lot aka Saigon, comes up with his dumbest Idea yet! He wants Erica Jean and the baby to move in with him! And Erica is so scared to say, "no" that she just clinches her teeth. All 2 of them!

Erica Jean is so scared of Saigon, that she looks like a hostage! She knows that she is in the presence of pocket sized psychopath, and she doesn't have her tazer!
Or her a fly swatter!

So, Saigon starts speaking in jail jargon, and says he wants to co habitat with Erica. Not co habit but co habitat! Nearly a decade in jail, with nothing to do but read and and workout, this little asshole must have been lifting the books and reading the weights!

Anyway, while Erica can understand the importance of a child growing up in a traditional household with both parents. She feels that her and Saigon's silly idea of purposely becoming pregnant with a stranger was down right retarded.

While a normal  man would sweeten the pot so to speak by giving a woman a gift or sweet talking her into saying yes. Saigon, a 7 year Prison veteran had an "ingenious" speech to get Erica to come live with him! You see, Saigon was known as the yardfather in jai. As in the prison yard! Yes Saigon was quite the rumbler in jail. And has the nickname to prove it!

So Saigon tells Erica that is so many words, he is the best thing that she will ever have the chance to date! You see, during his 7 year bid, Saigon read every romance novel that he could get his little hands on! And he told Erica, "look bitch, the man of your dreams is the one who will knock you the fuck out! Understand me bitch?" You understand me!

Goodness! This scene was uncomfortable to watch! She looked like a hostage! I hope for her sake she doesn't talk to this guy without a witness being there!

Anyway, before she can say yes to moving in with Saigon, he will have to at least meet her father first. And Erica is scared because when he meant her mother he tried to show off his midget tricks that he learned in Circ De Soulless! For the people who visit the VH1 website and watch the deleted scenes from the show, I know that you remember this one! Remember when Erica, her mother and the baby meant up with Saigon at Central Park, and he tried to do a cartwheel, and his little ass arms got tangled up in his shirt? And they had to cut a hole for him to breath?

Erica is scared that Saigon my try another stupid dwarf disaster, such as felling to his death by walking off of a sidewalk. Or drowning by taking an unattended bath!



Now we are Back at the Engine Room (studio) in the Financial District of New York City.

K. Michelle is in the studio, minding her own business and talking to herself.
And Peter walks up in there. Now, why would Peter come to the studio to bother K. Michelle? Because the show is fake! I mean, he wanted some advice!
And K Michelle tells him that in so many words. If Peter keeps trying to have his cake, and give in the circles too! I mean eat it too! These women will leave him for new penis!So he better commit himself to one hole, or he'll be homeless for the rest of eternity!

In the next scene, we visit Cantina Corsino Italiana in West Village New York City.

Tahiry walks in to go have lunch with Joe Budden

Come to find out, Joe has been masturbating a lot and is staying away from women. He is letting himself be gay and Mary! And when I say Mary, I don't mean, "merry" as in happy. I mean Mary as in his drag alter ego!

Tahiry with her humungous head found out that production has no need for her unless she is in a scene with Joe. So, in order for her to have airtime, get a check, and keep from Budden replacing her with a much better looking woman, she better be nice to him. After all, trashy reality tv. style shows starring rappers was invented by internet addict, and down low brother Joe Budden! Google it!
In other words, Joe is in charge. He probably signs Mona Scott's checks on the downlow!

Anyway, Tahiry admits to Joe that she in fact does love him. And no one is surprised by this news! I am however surprised by these two losers still being on this show! I am tired of that suspect Joe Budden, and that bloated, big headed squid faced heffer, Tahiry Jose! These two annoying people, right along with that crazy psychopath, Saigon, need to say their bygones! Jesus!


In the next scene. we visit Eventi in Chelsea New York City.
Amina  Buddafly is meeting up with that sorry sack of shit, Peter Gunz!
And she lets him know that she's  not trying to up her body count. She is through with adding new dicks to her long list partners in her sketchy, bed hopping past. She's ready to settle down with just him. So she let him know that he needs a place to stay like she needs dick. So he's better of just coming back home, and blowing her back out like a suicide bomber. And right before she can give him head under the table. He whips out the oldest cell phone that I've seen in a long time! That thing looked like a walkie talkie!

Anyway! So, he calls up some mystery man, and has him cue a a scrolling, windows slide show of different images. Which include the words "I love you Mr.s Pankey". As well as but not limited to. Pictures of their rings. Yeah, the one he didn't want to wear, and the one that she threw in the sewer! And get this, they even showed pictures from their sex tape! HOT DAMN!

Anyway, of course they are back together now. Or as Peter always tells Amina off camera. Dick, or Deported? Which one do you want bitch? Insemination or immigration? The choice is yours!


In our next scene, Erica Mena is meeting up with  a JEW, I mean her Jeweler! Who gives me the alcoholic vibe. And she is purchasing some big "ghetto", 18 Karat, white gold earrings in an attempt to buy Cynthia's soul back.

Now, not only does Cynthia kind of look like Erica. But her jewelers name is Eric! I mean how much can a bitch love herself? Speaking of love, she claims that she loves Cyn! LOL! Wow, you love yourself Erica, and you love what some people do for you. You don't give a damn about anyone but yourself!

Anyway,  when Cyn arrives, she sits down and opens up a small jewelry box, saw that their wasn't any food in it. Closed the box, and got her stuffed animal looking, fat ass up and headed towards the door!
She told Erica that she'd contact her. After a rebound fuck spree with as many people as she can! Then she stormed out of the room and ran for the boarder! I can't be the only one that thought, hey, she probably pawned them earrings and bought food with the money! I refuse to believe that I am the only one who thought that!


Now were in Edge Water New Jersey with Joe Budden, his father and Joe's big ugly dog. And Joe lets daddy Budden know that he is ready to foolishly propose to Tahiry. A booty model in her 30's that doesn't work out, looks sloppy already, that's about to look like somebodies Mexican's mothers in 3 to 5 years!  Bitch is shaped like a scoop of poop!

So, Joe's father told him that, his plans to marry Tahiry are cool and all. But the last time Joe visited his fathers house, he had 3 women in the mans living room! And I can assure you that this was Joe's drag team! Make up, hair and wardrobe. *snaps*

Anyway, my favorite lesbian Joe Budden says that he knows that Tahiry is the woman for him and he is the woman for her! And while Joe thinks that their is a possibility that Tahiry may say no, his father told him she will say yes for sure! Because the word on the street is, the Budden's like to beat their bitches! Even while they're pregnant. Just ask Joe.


In our final scene. We visit, Ripley-Grier Studios in Hells Kitchen New York City.


Erica Mena is dancing what some smoking hot choreographer chick! I mean she's up there with Erica! Slim, fit and can move too! Anyway, Erica is making an oddly shaped ass of herself by traying to dance and sing. And she's about to go from dancing all over the world, to making a fool of herself all over the world.

And to make it worst, she's doing this while wearing a sweat shirt that says, "Let Me Be Great" with a crown embroidered on it. I guess she thinks that she's the queen of auto tune! But this song needs a whole lot more than studio processing. It needs NASA. There's no way in hell this song will benefit anyone! Wait, actually she will be a tax write off. Just like her last flop song.

You may be wondering why I'm judging her music so harshly and that's because, in this scene I can hear Erica's new song loud and clear! And the lyrics sound like they were written by whoever wrote Friday for Rebecca Black! I honestly believe that this is the worst song writing I have ever heard. And I'm a song writer! And I'm deeply offended!

Anyway, Erica is shaking her funny looking ass around and making a fool of herself when Rich walks in. He is pissed because she set up this little dance class without his permission. And he has to pay for it! So, he is there to put her in her place! Her standpoint is that she didn't want to look like fool by not being able to dance or sing. So she wanted to at least get the dancing part down. And Rich feels that she is doing business behind his back, and he is about cry like Drake about it!

So they sit down to talk. And Erica lets him know that him yelling at Cynthia the way he did was unacceptable. And Rich lets her know that Cynthia is not important to him. She's irrelevant, doesn't matter at all. And Erica has foolishly signed a contract with Rich now, he's taken songs from, her before so. She better play her cards right, or she'll be begging for change with Peter. Mr. circles and Mr.s fake lesbian, holding matching signs which read, "will eat pussy for money!"

Anyway, after some intense yelling back and forth, and more finger pointing that Ellen's honeymoon. Rich lets Erica know that he's married to his money and that Erica is just the mistress. So she better stay in her place! Erica at this point is probably pretty pissed that she signed the contract with Rich Dollaz. Should have gone with your gut instinct Erica. You knew what Riches intentions were, and now he's gonna have his cake and eat you too. Besides, what can you do? Kick him in the neck? Like you did your babies daddy? (Loreal Laugh!)

Anyway, that was pretty much it for this week.


See you  next week for the next review. And don't forget to comment below and subscribe to my YouTube channel for more reviews, recaps, and opinions! And if you likey, share the video on facebook, twitter, goggle plus, myspace, or 2 cans with a string in the middle! In other words, tell a fucking friend!

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Love and Hip Hop New York | Season 4 | Episode 8 | Girls with Gunz | Review | Recap | Opinion

Love and Hip Hop New York | Season 4 | Episode 8 | Girls with Gunz | Review | Recap | Opinion

 

The show starts out at Fashion Week in Chelsea NYC with Tahiry and Joe Budden. Tahiry is minding her own business, having pictures taken by photographers who thought that she was someone important. When out of no where, Joe Budden pops up like Freddy Kruger! Joe is being ultra thirsty right now! He's sucking up to Tahiry's hanging ass trying to get back into her back into his good graces! And all she is giving Joe for all of that ass kissing is farts!

But forget all of that! I'm just trying to figure out why Joe is dressed like a gay man's couch from the 80's! Last year it was his infamous vest collection and he's continuing the tacky clothing choices tradition. Anyway!

Pretty much,  according to Tahiry, the worlds most annoying couple is over because she is through with being Joe's  cum bucket. And of course, that's bull shit! Tahiry will be back with Joe Budden pretending to leave him long after they're living in a nursing home. Driving the staff crazy!

One of my favorite parts of this scene is the extremely suspect facial expressions and laugh from Joe Budden. Sister Budden was selling himself hard to Tahiry. She must have been a good make up person for Joe when he dresses up as "Joann!" *snaps*

Seriously, If that man doesn't have enough sugar in his tank to win cake wars!

Anyway, My other favorite part of this scene is the tacky outfits that the run way models are wearing! Or should I say, run a way models! Run away from those dicks on their heads! I can't be the only one to noticed the vibrators that they were wearing at the end of the show! Yandy should have been there!



In the next scene, we visit Central Park in New York City!
Amina Buddafly is having a pick dick! I mean picnic with her sister Sophie! She flew her self in all the way from Germany to see her crazy, sexy and cool sister.

They are discussing Amina's mess of a life. And get this. Sophie implies that Amina is a home wrecker! She told her that she tends to find herself in messy, disgusting and dysfunctional relationships.

Amina is still completely delusional to Peter's infidelity! She let's Sophie know that she still thinks that Peter goes over to Tara's house, and stays overnight for his sons and not for the circles! Well, I guess she is still in denial for now.



In the next scene we are a at a photo shoot with the fake lesbians at Johne Ricard Studio in Midtown, Jew York City! I mean, New York City!

This photo shoot must be for a Mexican Maternity line because these two Latina's look pregnant! Cyn looks 2 months and Erica looks 3 and a half! But forget all of that!

Erica hid a necklace in her bathing suit for sin to dig out! She must have a magnet in her implants, because it stayed up there on her fake chest and thankfully it didn't travel down to that portal puss between her wrinkly legs! Anyway, The funny thing about it, is that Cyn held it up to Erica's chest and said, "it's the same chain that you have".

Wow! So, Erica hit up a buy one, get one free sale. And put the other chain to the side. And when she couldn't sell that cheap mess at a tag sale, she decided to throw it at the Chipotle Chipmunk to get her way.  At least that's how I see it!

 She gave her this latest gift, because she needed to butter up the slightly sloppy Cyn Santana because she had bad news!

The bad news is that she in fact signed the contract with Rich Dollaz! Cyn was of course pretty pissed off by this news! She was so pissed, she whipped her dick out! And let that silly Erica Mena know that she better stop that thirsty Rich when he tries to mix pleasure with business. Because, she knows that he will!

Yeah, like I said before! Cyn gives me the psycho vibe. Protect your neck Erica!
If you look at Cyn's eyes, and listen to her voice. she's a nut case! She'll be on snapped blaming the murder she committed on her split personality!


In our next scene we visit Covo Trattoria Pizzeria in Harlem, New York City.

Tara is meeting up with K. Michelle. Why you ask? Well, Tara wants some relationships advice from K. Michelle of all people. And I'm left thinking, that receiving relationship advice from K. Michelle is like asking a rapist for tips on how to spice things up in the bedroom.

Anyway, K. Michelle told Tara that her situation is "messy". And that as far as Tara staying with Peter for 13 years goes. She doesn't stay with people for 13 days! And that's includes pregnancies! Something Tara can relate to!

Now, why in the world would you consult a woman who lives in a haunted house, has no man, ditches relationships before her 2 week anniversary and refers to her vagina as a woo ha! We may never know!

In reality, Tara just wanted an excuse to go out and show off that new fake, phoney tail that she's wearing in this scene.

But why the hell is K Michelle sitting up there with that fake red hair and that animal print on? Looking like a Cheetah on it's period! I mean come one Kimberly! Anyway, K. Michelle tells Tara that she needs to talk with Amina and Peter! But she tells her to dress prepared to fight, with Timberland boots, Vaseline on her face. A gun in a holster, a freshly sharpened knife, a harpoon, a spear, a blow gun, some matches. A lantern, sand and salt mixture to throw into her eyes! 6 ninja stars, hollow point bullets, a syringe full of AIDS, a metal detector, a shovel, a cross bow and, don't forget to put her hair up! Okay maybe not all of that list!

Thanks Kimberly for giving a single mother street fighting advice! You must have made the hood rat Honor role. You must be the first in your family to get 4 point G.P HOE in bad advice! You fucking Ghetto Gagger Graduate! I just, I mean seriously. Why is she on the New York version again?


So, now we are at Daddy's House Studios in Midtown New York City.

With Rich Dollaz and Wyclef Jean of the Fugees! He's the one who stole that money from Haiti! Anyway, Rich lets Wyclef know that he'll suck em till his sack collapses, if he waits and says hi to Erica Mena when she shows up!

And right before Wyclef can turn to Rich, cuss him out, and smack him for offering his throat. Erica the weasel pops up. Wyclef plays it cool, air kisses with Erica, and runs out holding his ass!

Erica sits her loose booty down. And Rich turns on a flop record! Not a pop record, but flop record. Erica Mena's newest failure song, and these two believe that its a guaranteed hit! Yes! A hit record, they just forgot the "S" because it's a shit record!

I think that Erica Mena and Rich Dollaz are right! They think that this song, Dancing All Over the World, is about to be a big hit! Yeah, it will be a big hit, in recycling bins everywhere! That shit better be biodegradable!

So, Rich gives Erica the news that he dumped Peter for her! Then Rich tells his flop star girl friend to come sit on his lap, like he's Santa Claus or some shit! So, she sits down, and he looks her in the eyes and says, "Ho Ho Ho!" Then pulls her top down! Nah I'm shitting you! She sits on his lap, and they begin kissing! Too bad psycho Cyn didn't walk in!

She would've stomped Rich Dollaz flatter than her EBT card! Excuse me! her W.I.C. card. Women Infants and Chipotle!

Rich is so disrespectful and thinks so little of Cyn. That he claims ownership to Erica, says that she'll always be his sex slave, then processed to motor boat her! Yes! He stuck his waffle colored face into Erica's fake, funky press on breasts!
Now that's a brave man. I'd be scared to lose my face in there!


Moving along! Now, Amina and Peter are at Platinum Sound Studios, in Midtown New York City! They're lisitng to a terrible song titled "The Pankey's". And I'm watching this shit, thinking to myself that The Pankey's sounds like a gang that Camron would have been in 10 years ago!

But this shit wasn't a throw back record. It's a throw out record! At what point of making The Pankeys did these fools think that this sounded even remotely good?
The crazy thing about it is, Peter was the man in the 90's! He sold over a million copies on his first single, was nominated for a Grammy, ghost wrote music for Shaq and even did a song with Mariah Carey! And now he's sleeping on couches. Washing peoples car windows at red lights. Scratching for crack, and slinging dick for a place stay!

Anyways, Tara pops up,  and let's Amina know, that she has in fact been sleeping with Peter. And in her words, she sits on it whenever she wants! And when she told him to come eat her corn and make her butter melt! I mean, eat her pussy and make her cum, he definitely did so!

And she even told Amina that Peter's head game is on point! How on point you ask? She told Amina, that Peter can suck a beach ball, through a coffee straw! I don't know what that means, but it drove Amina crazy!


My boo Amina starts crying and carrying on! And her crying voice scared the hell out of me! She sounded like an ape giving birth! I mean, the sound that she was making was high pitched and disturbing! One part of me said, "damn, if I was there, I'd hold her so tight! Amina is such a nice girl and she doesn't deserve this treatment from anyone!". And the other part of me said, "somebody tell this bitch to shut the fuck up!"

Peter attempts to sweep the infidelity under the rug by stating that "Tara is going through a lot"!  I guess that's the best excuse that he could come up with!

The best part of the scene though, is that Tara is making sure that we all know that she just doesn't care at all what so ever about Amina's feelings. And I'm thinking, does Tara not realize, or not care that her sons have to go to school and have them bad kids picking at them about their mother slapping people, committing adultery, and letting homeless men go raw and skeet inside of her? On T.V.!

They'll never live this down! 

And the funny thing about it all. Is that just a few weeks ago, Tara was cutting Peters stuff up with a pair of scissors. Holding the open scissors by the blade! Now she is acting so high and mighty. Don't worry Tara, AKA idiot #1, your trashy ass will be crying on TV. again in no time. So have fun laughing at my sweet little Butterfly for now!

Amina is highly upset and she claims to want to leave Peter over his infidelity!
And when I say leave, I mean out of the room for less than a minute! Amina leaves out of the room. And then, ends up coming right back! After she put some Visine in her eyes, to make it stream down her face so that she'd have some fake tears! No, I'm, kidding! She was crying for real!

Amina is such a nice lady, that she asks Tara to let her talk to her husband. She could have told Tara to get out of the room considering she just admitted to sitting on his mouth! But Amina is too nice for all of that. And as polite as she was to Tara, Tara says sure. Then picks up her pocket book and as she is walking out of the door she says, "maybe someday I'll stop fucking your husband!"

Now, what kind if mother of two young boys, who is a professional in the work place says stuff like that? It's not like Amina is some foul bitch or anything. She is a super nice person. I'm talking Kindergarten teacher nice! I'm talking willing to breast feed a strangers baby nice! I'm talking so nice that she'd give a homeless man a hand job just to make his day better, and lick her fingers clean nice! Okay, maybe not that nice!


Anyway. after some yelling back and forth, and Peter trying to psychology screw with Amina's brain as usual. She leaves in a huff! Such a huff, that she hits herself in the back with the door! I am very concerned with Amina's saftey and well being! No, not because of doors attacking her! Because of her sweating issue! Remember that other episode where she was wearing that grey dress, and her arm pits and back were soaked with stinky sweat? Well in this scene her arm pits were so wet, she must smell like an African cab driver! Wait, she is half African!



Moving along, now were in the studio with the oldest and flattest ass on the show! J Dinero!  And she's pretending to rap at Quad Recording Studio in Midtown NYC. I'm convinced that she's not a rapper, but a therapist that the show hired to consult Ms. clueless, formally know as Yandy Smith!
Because whenever we see her, the conversation seems to be less about music and more about dating drug dealers who are in locked up and never getting out!

So, Yandy shows up to this fake studio session to ask J. Dinero about what she thinks will happen with Mendecees, rhymes with feces! J Dinero lets Yandy know that Mendecees is never coming out! And if he did, he's suffer from TBS. Tunnel Butt Syndrome.

No but seriously, why the hell does this J Dinero trick have such a little forehead! I am offended by the miniscule size of her fucking forehead! It's not right! Proportions bitch! A normal forehead is like 30% of a face! NOT TEN!

She looks like if I pet her, her whole head would come off.
And then to make it even worse. Cat head, is covered with wrinkles.
Yes, a million wrinkles on that little ass head! Looking like a little note pad!
Eww, she gives me gas!

Anyway, J. Dinero let's Yandy know, that Mendecess being released is like Chris Bosh's sexuality, he'll never come out! So, she better invest in a really good dildo!


Now Erica Mena is visiting Rich Dollaz at his apartment. And Erica is still acting thirsty about Rich and dick in general! Erica tells Rich that she stopped by to say hello to his door man. Rich tells her that he wouldn't be surprised! LMAO! That's when you know, that you're a whore! Your ex boyfriend's all like, yeah, you wanna fuck the doorman too! LMAO! What a slut! Oh well, at least she's extra pretty!

So, Erica lets Rich know that he needs to stop playing games, and let her know whether or not he is going to take her back! She implies that she is just with Cyn Satana until Rich gives her all of his money! I mean heart!

Now, Rich would love to have a threesome, but J Dinero has more forehead than Rich has game! So, Erica lets him know in so many words, that if he steps up and gives her a title, such as girlfriend, she will break up with Cynthia! And get back with him. But Rich is playing hard to get for now.


Now we have to take a quick visit to Johns Pizzeria in Jersey City New Jersey.
Joe Budden's ex crack feen momma! Faye, Is celebrating 25 years of being clean from that crack! Yep! Joe Budden's momma, Faye, was sucking that glass dick! Yup! Joe Buddens mama used to be pookeisha!


I just wanna know why she has her hair in them braids! Her hair is breaking like the inside of Mendecess ass right now!

Anyway, Joe Budden pops up out of thin hair, I mean thin air! Looking like a gay soldier this time! He has on his tight little pink camouflaged hoodie. Honey! *snaps*  Yaaas! He looked like a man, at war, with his sexuality! Don't ask don't tell Budden!

Joe is like every girls gay friend who hasn't come out of the closet yet! It's like we all know about the pink elephant in the room. But Tahiry has been a loyal beard for years! And I have a feeling that Joe has that Detox dick! Never gonna come out! [DR. DRE VOICE] HELL NO!

Anyway, Joe and his mother got down on their knees and kissed Tahiry's big sloppy, hanging ass and tried to get her to come back to Sammy Suspect, I mean Joe Budden! The man the rap world has been calling gay since 2003! Don't ask what his one hit song, "Pump It Up" was really about! Anyway, just like Rich with Erica, Tahiry is playing hard to get for now. But we know that wont last long!

So, now were at Mellisme in Flatoiron NYC Yandy, K. Michelle and Tara are celebrating Tara's birthday! She's about 36 years old on paper, with a 56 year old turkey neck.

And this scene looks like it should be a show on B.E.T.! A show titled, "white women here I cum!" Now before you crazy black women attack me, let me explain why I say this! We have Yandy here, who has a man in jail getting the innards of his ass beat like pancake batter.

K. Michelle who is a violent, fake red headed, pseudo psychologist who can't keep her hands nor her flowers to herself. Yet can tell everyone else what they need to do with their lives! And then we have Tara! A nearly 40 year old harlot, addicted to adultery, pill popping, and a scissor stabbing psychopath to boot!
So yeah, I'm gonna marry an Asian women!

Tara is bragging to the girls about how she has been committing adultery with Peter. And even K. Michelle with her old busted baseball glove looking pussy having self is disgusted!

K Michelle made Tara swear on crackers, cheese, grape koolaid and her plan b pill stock pile that she was done sleeping with Peter. And Tara replied by saying, "yeah bitch, sure, whateva!" We all know that the only time that Tara closes her legs around Peter is when she wraps them around his neck! Or his waist!

Anyway! Come to find out, Yandy Smith is in pre production for a film. And she wants Tara to come and audition for a part in the movie! And if the role is a struggling no name actress, that no one cares about, that's almost 40 years old, an adulterer, emergency contraceptive addict, with a filthy ex boyfriend of 13 wasted years, that climbs through her window, like Bruh Man from the 5th flo (floor) that sleeps on her couch then yeah! She'll be perfect for the movie!

In our next scene, Erica goes to Phillipe Chow in Midtown New York City. AlBee, Erica's completely straight friend is there to give her some much needed advice. Wait a minute! Did I say that AlBee is straight? I meant to say flaming! I'm talking on fire like a faulty wire. I mean, he's so gay he makes himself feel uncomfortable.

Erica is crying to this gay dude extra hard. And the vein in her head almost ejaculates everywhere! Seriously! Her forehead was about to skeet skeet skeet skeet skeet mother fucker! This crazy woman has been crying a lot lately. She just can't do right. She's just a fuck up! Pick a bridge Erica! You know you want to.

Long story short, he told this idiot that she is doing stupid stuff to put her self in a shaky situation. And Cyn might end up on Snapped after offing Erica and Rich!
I totally agree AlBee! She sure is an idiot!


In our final scene, we are at Bikram Yoga New York City, on the Upper Westside of New York City! Peter the pussy eater is standing out there in the cold, holding flowers. And Amina Buddafly pops up! Ready to go do some Yoga!

Peter once again attempts to manipulate the mind of my sweet little Amina. And she let him know that she isn't having that. And  that she wants him to wear his cheap ring, stay away from Tara and and let her eat, I mean meet the children! And you know what they say, a Vampire can never enter your home unless you invite them in! And Tara's rules were, no vampires in her house or around her children! So, unless Tara changes her mind, that may never happen.

The best part of this scene is Amina's boobs in that little green shirt! I had to point that out! Anyway, Amina, if you're gonna be with a bum who sleeps on couches, divorce Peter and marry me! I don't cheat and, I rub feet!

Well, that was pretty much it for this episode! If I offended you, then good! I'm usually more offensive. I'll try harder next time!

See you soon for the next review. And don't forget to comment below and subscribe to my YouTube channel for more reviews, recaps, and opinions! And if you likey, share the video on facebook, twitter, goggle plus, myspace, or 2 cans with a string in the middle! In other words, tell a fucking friend!

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Radio Show Announcement! FIRST SHOW! CALL IN LIVE! - New Videos - New Channels NEWS!

Radio Show Announcement! FIRST SHOW! CALL IN LIVE! - New Videos - New Channels NEWS!

I have a major announcement to make!

On  Thursday January 2, 2014 at 6 PM, I will be going live, on Blog Talk Radio.
That's right! MEET Magazine, Music Entertainment Education and Technology Magazine will be jumping off of YouTube and onto the radio airwaves!

http://www.blogtalkradio.com/meetmagazineinterviews


I had a goal of interviewing interesting people from different walks of life. Including celebrities and everyday people who are creative and inspiring.
This year I will be interviewing musicians, artists, actors, writers, bloggers, scientist, meta physicians, psychics, educators, and so many more interesting people. You wont want to miss it! My first guest is Tori Ferguson AKA Tokyo Terror! A Graphics artist and college student from Atlanta Georgia!

(Click link below for the show!) Listen live, visit the chat room Live!

http://www.blogtalkradio.com/meetmagazineinterviews/2014/01/02/graphic-artist-and-designer-tori-furgeson-tokyo-terror-interview

Call in and ask Tori questions Live!
(646) 595-4706

Put that number in your phone. It's the call in number for my shows. And, if you have a free blog talk radio account, don't forget to follow my show for announcements and reminders of new episodes!

_______________________________________________________________

Now in new channel news and new videos news. I will be posting loads of new videos this January, February and throughout the year of 2014! Including, Reviews, News and Interviews! On 3 new YouTube channels!

That's right, I will have a new channel for interviews, A separate new channel for news stories and a new main channel which will feature television, music and other reviews along with opinions and random ramblings etc! Just like this one!

So, the channel that you are viewing this video on will be pretty much placed to the side for several months. And I'll need you to subscribe to whichever new channels that you are interested in. Their will be an official announcement video and blog posting in  less than a week with links to each channel where their will be several new videos.

I'm thinking about waiting and posting my new Black Ink Crew reviews, along with my New Love and Hip Hop video on this brand new reviews and opinions channel!But I might not be able to wait a few days. Who knows? So, stay tuned to my old channel until the change takes places.

In the meantime. Please come and listen to my debut Radio Show tomorrow, at 6pm. Thursday, January 2, 2014!

I'll have the chat room open about an hour before the show! So, you can speak with me live there and over the phone. The show ill be approximately 30 - 45 minutes beginning at 6PM,  and live chat at about 5 pm! Don't miss it!

Subscribe to my current YouTube channel!
https://www.youtube.com/user/meetmagazine2/videos

@meetmagazine

Love and Hip Hop | New York | Season 4 | Episode 7 | Messy All Over the World | Review | Recap | Opinion

Love and Hip Hop | New York | Season 4 | Episode 7 | Messy All Over the World | Review | Recap | Opinion 

 

 

The episode starts out at Stadium Red in Harlem New York.

Saigon is in the studio rapping in the sound proof booth, wearing his sons shirt and hat. And Erica Jean comes by so that he can apologize for being bi polar, and full of shit! I mean for being a jerk, and throwing her pocket book in the bushes! So, the midget stands up on a chair and says that he is sorry but, his dad did it to his mom so get over it!

Of course whistle mouth accepts his apology. And the two agree on making a trip to the therapist to make sure that the baby is okay after all! I can't help to notice that this appears to be a continuous pattern with these two. Saigon has a jail mentality and he doesn't know what to do without white people being there to guide him! And he only seems to be able to smash with make up sex!

Think about it! When he wanted her to take a DNA test to confirm the paternity of their child. They argued and then she complied, and they sent the test off to the white man. It comes back, and they kiss and make up! Same thing in this situation! They have an explosive argument in public, they go see some white people, and then everything is fine and he gets to fall into the GAP!

The best part of this scene is when he tells her that he loves to see her smile! She'll never hear that lie in her lifetime ever again! This chicks two front teeth are in a long distance relationship. And you love to see that smile? You lying fucking midget! Oh well, as small is he is, all he can tell is little lies!


In the next scene, we take a trip to 30th Street Guitars in Midtown New York City!

Amina and Peter are meeting up. And Peter is all ready not wearing his wedding ring! And he is still sleeping at Tara's place! Amina is about start biting necks!
But Peter soothes her savage vampire nature by letting her know that her expressing anger, or disappointment is acting like Tara in his eyes. After a few lines about the kids missing him, and how they are the only reason why he is there, she is back under his spell!

I swear, this fool should be a Preacher! He'd have a place to live, and he'd get to lie to women all of the time! Anyways! Amina tells him that she wants to eat, I mean meet the children.

Peter lets Amina know that Jameson is cool but Kaz is a little snitch, so she can meet the quite one! Amina lets Peter know that he needs to severe ties with Tara and start acting like a husband. Ha ha! Good luck with that one!

Now we pay a visit to Rich's apartment in Edgewater New Jersey.
Erica Mena stops by, and Rich has to explain his stupid idea of hiring Peter Gunz to manage Erica Mena! He basically wanted Peter to help with day to day operations. Erica feels that Peter needs to mind his own business and worry about his own problems.

Erica stresses to Rich that she fully understands that she isn't perfect. But Peter is
And at the end of the day, she wants Rich more than anything in the world! In other words, this lame, thirsty, no game having bastard is packing! Why else in the world would Erica Mena want this guy. I'm not hating! I am happy for Rich!


Now, we take a trip to Platinum Studios in Hells Kitchen NYC! Rich has  a meeting with Yandy! And when we see Rich Dollaz on Love and Hip Hop New York. He is usually either doing 1 of 4 things! He's  #1 drinking, #2 counseling a man on something stupid that he did to a woman. #3 Being yelled at by a woman. Or #4 a woman is crying to him about something stupid that she did! So with that said lets see what the fuck Yandy wants!

Yandy lets Rich know that when they last saw each other. And she was dressed like Shonuff from The Last Dragon. The reason why she yelled at him like he was an inferior little troll was because, she was on her period! I mean she was stressed out about business and Mendecess possibly having to wear a diaper when they're done with him in jail!

Anyway! She starts crying and carrying on about Bail hearings that are supposed to happen that never do, yada yada yada! Yandy! You choose to be with a drug dealer because he had curly hair and, "swagger". Do like the other single mothers with babies daddies in jail do, and get some dick. Then call the Dr. in the morning! We'll get to that tramp in a minute!

I think that Yandy's crying didn't work on her dad, so now she crying to Rich! Next thing you know the kids will be with Rich, or with her mom! Looks like Yandy will be taking a vacation! To get her mind off of things. I think that she just needs a vibrator. And to move on from Mendecees!

Now we are at MBK Entertainment in Midtown NYC. K. Michelle has been going through a few things with her team behind the scenes. It seems like no one is competent in their job. Except for her closet full of wigs!

Being the gutter butt, country trailer trash that she is, K. Michelle lets her co manager, Jeanie Mclean know that she needs some dick and a visit from the Ghost Hunters to search her haunted house for evil spirits. And when I say house, I mean VAGINA! Jeanie politely lets this nut case know that they are managers and not an escort service!


So now we are at Gaslight, in the Meat Packing Districts of NYC!
Team Waffle, Rich and Peter are meeting up to discuss Erica trying to feed soup kitchen Peter with a plate! And this conversation has to go by fast so that Peter can continue training for the Bum Fights championship!

Peter tells Rich that he has to chose between Royalty or Ratchetness! And he doesn't explain to us which one is supposed to be which! Rich doesn't want to pick between the two. However seeing that Erica makes him money and it costs money to raise a Peter! If Rich does have to choose, he chooses perfect 10 Erica Mena, over sponsoring that black foot homeless child known as Peter!

I said in an earlier review that I think that Peter may be Rich's muscle. You know, like if someone has to get beaten up or shot! And Peter lets it be known. That Rich can't rely on him anymore for defense. Or when some guys wanna come at Rich's neck, as he put it! Yeah, Peter is nothing but trouble, all the way around!

Now were at Oz Studios in Midtown NYC! We are once again checking in with the queen of Ratchet, K. Michelle.  But she isn't alone. She brought some big nasty looking woman named Tracie Renee up in there, whose butt is shaped like a shitty diaper. And of course fat Paris had to show up too! They must have had food somewhere!

Anyway, K. Michelle starts shedding big fake crocodile tears about blogs like Mediatakeout.com spreading alleged rumors about her being pregnant! The funny thing about it is, she thinks that her ex assistant Brianna is a nut case for crying over eating chicken despite being a vegetarian! Just to keep a job, and please K. Michelle! The poor thing just may have eaten her own  child to keep the job too!

Yet, you sit up there crying with fat girls about pregnancy rumors on the internet? You're lucky that anybody is talking about you at all! Stop beating people with flowers and maybe someone will have sympathy for you. You need to go make friends, and make out with Dutchess Lattimore from Black Ink Crew! You two are perfect for each other!

Oh, and before I move on from this silly subject. I just remembered something. The blogs posted pictures of her humungous, penis fly trap. That she affectionately calls her "woo ha"! The pictures show that she has a kangaroo pouch between her legs, and her pussy so big that she can smuggle big headed Mexican's into America over the border! Despite multiple photos, in multiple outfits, this crazy idiot claims that the images were, "photo shopped".  Really bitch?

Moving along!

Now we are AT Yandy's office in Brooklyn. And she receives a call from her jail bird boyfriend. She hangs up the phone with whoever she is talking to take his call! Now that's a business woman! Anyway,Mendecee has yet another alleged bail hearing looming.

At this point, Mendecees bail hearings are like that dad, that calls his son up on the phone and swears that he is going to pick him up, but doesn't show up!
We'll just have to wait and see!


Now were at Marcus Vineyard in Brooklyn with Tahiry and Lexi! They are still trying to figure out how they can save their father from skipping to house to house like Peter Gunz! And Lexie throws out the idea of having some sort of concert to raise money! And, I hope that she wouldn't hire Joe Budden! Because they'd need more than 20 concert goers to raise enough money to help their father!

Tahiry thinks that they need to send their father money to keep the raggedy place that he already has!  Lexie feels that Tahiry is being flaky! And Lexie, who is shaped like a bag of potatoes, hates flaky!

She appears to have abandonment issues. I don't if she was left behind at the museum during a class trip. Or if her mother dropped her off on some strangers doorstep but something happened! Life has been rough to Lexie! She should totally take her frustrations out at the gym! Nah, but seriously, I hope that she doesn't hurt anyone, including herself. I smell a crazy island girl, ticking time bomb! Rhianna part 2 right here! Just you wait and watch!

I don't know whether or not we will ever know the whole truth about these two, but I do believe that Lexie cannot trust Tahiry. And Tahiry is full of shit. I mentioned this in earlier reviews, I am not fan of Tahiry, or Taranasha! Anyway, they ended off the scene early because Lexie stormed off crying in the bathroom. These two bore me and annoy me so much that I wish their was a portal in that damn bathroom that would make them just disappear!


Now it's time to take a trip to Panama and visit our favorite fake lesbians. Erica Mena and the Gaucamole Gangster, the Taco Terrorist, the Chipotle Chola, with her refriend bean drawn on eye brows, yup, slightly sloppy Cyn Santana!

Anyway! The Dyke-namic duo bonded by dancing, playing and dildoing on the beach. And some poor island woman may have abandoned her little big headed baby because I saw Erica holding the little miho! Now, I have never seen Erica holding her own child but, at least I got to see her interact with children. She actually didn't look out of place in a motherly role.Let me stop. I am #TeamEricaMena 100% ! All day everyday!


I must warn you. What I have to say about this next scene may shock and offend you. Viewer and reader descretion is strongly advised!

So, Team Midget, Snake mouth and Head detective are finally going to therapist. In my opinion, hey need to be taking snake to the dentist. Maybe in the next episode!
Anyway, they arrive at Dr. CarMicheals office in Midtown NYC. And this is false advertising off the bat! I don't see any cars or any Jackson! CarMichaels my ass! They wouldn't get a dime from me for that reason alone! And before I really go into this scene. I just want to say this!

I now know why he threw this Erica's bag! He reached out with those little Kangaroo arms, and thought that he grabbed her! And when he figured out that he only got her bag, he threw it the bushes out of frustration! If you pay attention, whenever they get into an argument. She never tells him to go beat his dick, because he can't reach it! Mmm Hmm, remember when they were arguing in the car, in front of Erica's crazy fathers house? You're telling me that you didn't see his booster seat? Hell, when they were in the restaurant he was sitting in a high chair!  Anytime a man list, "the rattle" as an instrument that he plays. You know that he's tiny! Just wanted to let you know that little guy! I mean, little Sai.

Anyway, Saigon was right! His son, according to 2 doctors testimony, has in fact not been being stimulated on a daily bases! The speech pathologist suggested that they see a psychologist. Which means that fake butt has been shooting paint balls out of her gap instead of teaching that boy something!

I don't understand what Sponge Bob could be doing with her time! She has no job! She's wearing the same dress in this scene that she was wearing when he read the DNA results!  It's not like she goes shopping with her time. Or is busy getting her hair done! And Lord knows that she does spend any time picking food out of her teeth! Damn you Saigon! You should have known that something wasn't right when her dumb ass tried to read a coloring book the baby!

And fuck all of y'all talking about. How dare he go in on Queen La-teetha like that? I talk about her like this because she a bow legged mouth and I'm tired of looking at that Geedy Gap! Not greedy, but geedy. Because it ate the "R"! Selfish bitch needs to give Peter guns an apartment in that space in her mouth! Sitting up there flossing her mangled mouth with shoe strings instead of speaking to her baby! Pathetic!

Anyway Dr. Chloe CarMichael informs us about some terrible news!, The other Dr. wrote down that Steven, or little B. Bangs his head when he's angry or upset, so that he can get his words out! I guess we now know what to get him for Christmas. A hat that says, "out of order" on it.

You gotta love this cute Dr. named Chloe! She held back her laughter when she saw how Saigon's son is taller than him. And she didn't call Erica Jean, field  goal mouth or kick a football at her even once! Now that's a professional!


For the record. Fuck y'all that sat around judging Saigon for wanting a DNA test! With all of that head butting that the boy is doing. Saigon probably thought that he was Chad Ocho Cinco's son! All I know is. They better get him a helmet quick! Because his brain is gonna look like the inside of Mendecees ass the way that he's going! Sheesh!

Nah but seriously Saigon! You only have yourself to blame. You know damn well that Erica sling shot mouth Jean is retarded as a fuck! And you're a midget. Now you wanna complain when your baby come out thinking that he's a hammer head shark! Really, mother fucker, really?!!!

You knew as soon as she spoke, that her Genes, had holes in them. She talks like she has no tongue. Then to top it off, when you see a normal person smile, you see a little sparkle on their tooth. When she smiled at you, everything went black! Come on son! And then you know that when you ejaculate, your sperm has band aids and crutches on them! So, what did you really expect? Don't try to shit diamonds you idiot!

I just feel sorry for that, poor baby! Next thing you know, we'll find out that Erica Jean and Saigon are related! And I thought that my life was fucked up!

Anyway, Cutie Chloe is gonna teach their little boy how to talk. Seeing that Erica Jean must have gone to school with Fantasia!

Anyway. Now we are at Greenhouse in Soho NYC. Don't ask me why K. Michelle has long fake red hair and a referee shirt on. She like she's starring in a movie titled, "Rhianna goes to Prison". And don't ask me why Paris looks like a big black Disco Ball!
These two goofey broads are celebrating K. Michelle's album hitting number 2 on the Billboard album sales charts!

Anyway, they get inside and Messy Yandy is there with an artist, that looks a lot like Grafh! I am not sure whether or not that was him though. Anyway!

Peter and Amina show up. And before they can sit down good, Yandy notices her cousin Peter Gunz wedding ring. (And yeah, according to her grandfather, they are cousins!) Anyway! Her fellow mean girl, K. Michelle asks Peter when the last time he slept with Tara was! And nasty, messy Yandy says, do you really think that he is going to sit here in front of his wife and tell you that he slept with Tara three weeks ago? And this right here is why Yandy and K. Michelle deserve every tear that they shed in this episode.

These two have bad Karma! They are Villains! Too bad their nemesis's Erica Mena and Chrissy Lampkin didn't show up with brass knuckles and spiked bats! I am sure that if Erica brought K. Michelle the cup cakes that she brought Angela Yee, these two wig warriors would have had an immediate shift in the attitude department!

Anyway, Peter says that one of these days, he will have to sit with both of these women and his life will be exposed. Yeah, in the next episode! And he said that both of them may leave him and that may be the best thing to happen to him! Yeah Peter! You probably have some of your stuff at 2 groupies houses right now. Two new women! One of the most offensive parts of Peters confession to Yandy and K. Michelle, is when he toasts and says, "Praise the Lord!" Trust me Peter, Lucifer doesn't cosign your bull shit!

And Amina is Clueless! She's been conned once again into believing that whatever they were discussing was in his past and he has moved on from Tara!
But, what I am concerned with is this. Why does Amina sound like Daffy duck having a seizure when she talks?

She sounds like she has a mouth guard on when she speaks! You're a singer, not a boxer, bitch! Spitting when you say, "Mississippi" is one thing. But you're not supposed to spit when you say, "hi". And and it's not normal to lisp when you yawn. Peter needs to take her to see Chloe! I've talked to cats that speak English better than Mike Tyson! I mean Amina!

In our next scene, we make visit to Cynergy Spa with America's favorite fake lesbian duo! And yes, Cynergy is spelled with a C, like Cyn Santana! These two are back from Panama, and they decide to take a dyke dip in the bath tub to have a Latina Toast! By bumping Taco's of course! Anyway, they are pretending to be in love, trying their hardest to like each other as more than friends, and with all of this awkward kissing. I wont believe that they are real lesbians until I see somebody give somebody the "circles!" Now that's entertainment!

In the next scene. Yandy is meeting up the Adultery avenger, Taranasha Wallace!
They meet up outside of Ground Support. And sit down on a bench as if they are waiting for a bus. Hopefully not the one driven by Stevie J! Anyway, Tara is dressed like she should be. Like she lives in a barn.  She must have been shoveling some of that Peter feet feces! And Yandy has on a skimpy little white outfit as if she is about to attend a hookers wedding.

And I can tell that Tara has moved on to new penis! Because like a typical woman who has moved on to the next one, she has a new hairdo! And she is dressed differently. I never saw her dressed like she works with horses before! And just like MiMi, I bet the new guy is as straight as a grape! I'm talking Jellyfish wrist! Just wait and watch!
Anyway! They are discussing the scene where Amina and Peter bumped into K. Michelle and Yandy!

Yandy informs Tara that Peter spoke very nicely of her, and her mothering skills. However he lied about not knowing when the last time he stick his Peter inside of her. And in a classic display of too much information. Tara tells Yandy, that not only does she sleep with Peter whenever she wants, over the last 2 months, she has probably taking 2 plan B pills! In other words Peter has been going raw like a vegan!

Up until this point, I didn't like Tara. And with that epic stupidity being displayed, and the aroma of adultery nestled in my nostrils. I so hope that Tara doesn't bring her old adulterous looking neck back next season! The lines on her neck, her new hairdo. The whole, she is a better quality of whore meat than Amina act, I mean,  I'm just done with her.

In our final scene, we pay a visit to Grand Canal Court to play some basket ball with Peter Gunz and my little pony, I mean Saigon! And midget man is doing handicapped tricks like, passing the ball behind his back. And living up to his Indian name! Saigon in the Indian language translates to "Little Arms!"

I mean seriously! His arms are so short, one day he was road raging, and he tried to flip somebody off and poked himself in the eye! Their is no reason to have arms that short! Shit! If he tried to hug himself all he'd do was clap! And all Erica Jean does is mock him with that gap! Talking about, "My teeth can do something that your arms can't do. And that's reach out!"

Nah for real though! I'd hate to be Saigon! Because if the police ever run up on him and say, "Hey nigger turn around, and put your hands on your head". He's gonna turn around, lift them little ass arms up. And be like, oops! "I can do the chest now! The head ain't happening".

Anyway!

The game was cut short because Planned Parenthood's costumer of the month, two months in a row! Tara Wallace shows up! And she bum rushes the court!
Peter didn't recognize her at first because of the new hairdo! He nearly called her one of his other bitches names, until he notice the candy necklace man of Plan B pills!

Tara walks up on Peter, and with the power of flat butt and flat acting, she lets him have it! She let that jerk know that she doesn't appreciate being embarrassed in front of short bus K. Michelle who has a haunted pussy! And Yandy who has a man whose going to probably be in prison for the next 20 years, with a line in the showers longer than Black Friday, waiting for their turn to pull his curly hair out!
If you gotta impress somebody, Yandy and K. Michelle are the last people to worry about! You stupid bitch! Walking pill bottle! Shut the fuck up!

Anyway! Taranasha has no issues with committing adultery, with a homeless man who sleeps on her corroded couch. Yet she is ranting and raving to Peter about him wearing a ring! And some how viewers think that she is the smart, woman in this? And the better catch compared to Amina?

Anyway. At the end of the scene Peter lets Tara know that he fake loves her.
To which Tara replies, "Who gives a fuck about love?"  And you know what Tara? You're right!

So, since Tara doesn't want anything to do with love. And the only thing Hip Hop about her is working at Guitar Center. This needs to be her first and last season!
If not, then next season Tara will do just like Joseline Hernandez and Tami Roman, she'll be having abortions on TV!  Just remember this Tara, before you have your abortion. I have a fortune cookie for you. And it reads, "Vacuum your floors, before you vacuum your womb! That's all!

See you next week for my review.

Make sure to subscribe to my YouTube channel and comment below!

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Black Ink Crew | Season 2 | Episode 10 | You Got Some Stupid Ears | Review | Recap | Opinion

Black Ink Crew | Season 2 | Episode 10 | You Got Some Stupid Ears | Review | Recap | Opinion

 

 

Time for the Black Stink, I mean Black Ink Crew review, recap and opinion. It's episode 10 already! And this one is titled, "You Got Some Stupid Ears". Let's get into it!

The episode starts out with Ted and Tiffany in the shop. Then Dutchess and Ceaser walk in looking pitiful. Dutchess is letting out her inner animal today. Her animal print dress shows that she's a Cheetah! Get it? Cheetah, cheater. Because starving Marvin was eating it up right? Yeah so, anyway! O'Shit and Walt show arrive at the show next.

Dutchess says that she doesn't care about the other people going to Puma's bachelor party and that she doesn't care about them coming back either. So, she doesn't care if they live or die. I guess that 's what that means. Anyway, Ceaser states that the strip club that they went to in the last episode must have been the worst one that he has ever frequented.

Dutchess says that she doesn't understand what Ceaser was thinking. Being at Puma's bachelor party is crack head city! And top models don't strip for crack heads!
 

But forget all of that! The infallible, super model Tiffany Winter, who just happens to be half Jamaican, and half Polish asks whether Ceaser and Dutchess will be attending Puma's wedding in Jamaica. Ceaser says, "Oh Yeah, Oh Yeah!" Dutchess replies by saying, if cone head, I mean Ceaser is going, then yeah, she's going too! Puma better have the dog house ready for Dutchess!


In the next scene Dutchess gets a visit from Beverly! The Latina that she drew the Phoenix rising from a Lotus flower on. After some healing it is finally time to color it in! I can't help but to notice that Beverly looks like one of those Mob Wives! She has that whole, "Crime Family" look to her! Don't shoot Beverley! Just saying!


Anyway! Beverly states that her Karma tattoo that Dutchess drew on her is the one that people love the most! And she says that she believes in Karma. Dutchess says that she doesn't believe in Karma. But she does believe in the Golden Rule. Aka, Luke 6:31  "do unto others as you would have them do unto you."

 Which means that Ceaser is gonna cheat on her with his ex right? *clears throat*

Anyway, this pretty bird gets some color on that pretty bird carved into her leg! And it looks fantastic! That Phoenix looks like Toucan Sam! It's a pretty rainbow Phoenix! Rising from flames. And you thought that Dutchess was good for nothing?  Ha ha!


In the next scene, Puma meets up with Quani at Sylvia's restaurant. The couple are talking about Puma's Bachelor party. Come to find out, they go to strip clubs together so, the debauchery is something that she personally enjoys! But forget all of that! Quani is an interesting name, and all, but I may start calling her coiny. Because her gap looks like a coin slot! She looks like if I slipped a quarter in her mouth and turned her ear, candy would pop out! Just don't ask which end! And don't eat the Snickers! It's not made of chocolate!

Puma lets Quani know that he is contemplating inviting Ceaser to their wedding in Jamacia. Quani is okay with Ceaser coming and not okay with Dutchess being there.
You see, Dutchess questioned whether or not Puma was the father of Quani's child.
And she went so far as to flat out call her a floozie! A trollop!  A loose in the caboose, goose. Or as you Urban Contemporaries would word it, a "Hoe"!

I couldn't help but to notice something in this scene. Quani's engagement ring! Puma must of gotten it from Arkansas. Because that's a little rock! Now, that's a struggle ring if I've ever seen one!  I am not sure of which 25 cent machine Puma got it from but damn! If he told her that he got a ring, that was an "invisible set". Yeah, that stone is almost invisible! And it's not a diamond! It appears to be a sapphire. When I get some free time, I'll put a magnifying glass to the screen and figure it out! The last time I saw something that small, blue and pitiful, I was looking at Eazy E! Rings like this is why they say, "it's the thought that counts!"


In the next scene, we're with the God of mistakes, mess ups and the inventor of internet memes! O'Shit finds out that the cops illegally searching the vehicle that he was in, may lead to him getting out of the charges that he currently faces!

And I'm left thinking, that this is like attracting like in it's purest form! This idiots folly has potentially brought him good fortune for once! He should make sure to not ruin it! You know, like don't walk under ladders, don't let black cats cross your path, and get a vasectomy! Anyway, he does a very early celebration dance that looked like crackheads on ice!

But the celebration doesn't stop there. He gets even more good news. Coley, aka O'Shits first babies mom, or the White one. And their daughter Lula, are in town to pay him a visit. He informs Lulu that they are going to the zoo today! She'll be somewhat disappointed when she finds out that the zoo is his job! Yup! Black Ink is a zoo! A bunch of animals and Lion Tamer Tiffany Winter!

Mmm! Love me some Tiffany!

So, he brings his main family to the shop.

Lulu wants Ceaser to dress up like a clown so that she can laugh at him! Gotta love kids! She doesn't realize that Ceaser was born a clown! Anyway, he lets her draw on his face with a permanent marker instead! He should have let her draw some chapstick on his big lips! Or some hair on his head!  Oh well, maybe next time!


Now it's time to catch up with Puma, as he pays a visit to a barber shop named Bronx Block. His barber, Sugar *snaps* will be weed whacking that palm tree on his head! Ceaser was next door getting his hair did. The car wash next door buffed his skull extra shiny for this occasion! The funny thing about it is, Ceaser says that it's raining cats and dogs, yet neither one of them have water on them. And as a fan of the show, we all know damn well that the Black Stink cast hasn't seen water since Jesus saw earth!


Puma lets Ceaser know that he can come to the wedding but Dutchess can't! Because if she shows up, Quani is gonna have the same expression on her face the Puma had, the year that Ceaser gave him a comb for Christmas! This news of course, royally pissed off Ceaser! If he had hair, he would have pulled it out! I kid you not, Ceaser jumped up out of his seat, quicker than Sassy sitting on bed of Dicks! And ran out of that door faster than Dutchess facing a lie detector test!

Without the SideShow Bob hair do, Puma come to find out has huge ears! Oh well, at least you look like a distinguished crackhead now!


Back at the shop Tiffany hands Walt a letter with his fathers name on it.
He really needs closure in his missing father situation. I don't understand why he didn't just put his face on a milk carton! Anyway! After a couple of bogus calls, the search has just begun! But he knows that he will eventually find him! Because his name is Ronald Miller, not Waldo!

I noticed something interesting going on here. In the episode where Dutchess was flirting with Marvin. She was wearing a black shirt with a floral print. In the earlier scene with Puma and Quani, Quani had on a similar print dress and now. Tiffany has on a black shirt with floral print! Hmm! Ain't that something? Might be a trend going on in New York!


Back at the bail bondsman office.

The bail bondsman find out that the District Attorney put in a plea for O'Shit to receive 3 years in prison! O'Shit took a, himself in his pants when he heard this information!
Here he is thinking that he got a get out of jail free card, then he get's this news!

The bail bondsmen let him know that they think that he will be in jail for 3 years. And they hand him a gift pack! Soap, a tooth brush, some potato chips, and a cigarette! No Vaseline for his ass! No ball gag to keep the squealing down.

The Bail Bondsman found out their information by doing a quick internet search with O'Shit's real name. Richard Duncan, and his birth date 1984.  I find his name to be very ironic. Dick Duncan! He was set since birth, with a cursed name! His mother should have named him couch bed, so he would pull out for once!

I know, cheesy but effective!


Back at the shop. A client comes in and she wants a tiger tattoo! Grrr! O'Shit left the drawing in a cab. Luckily for him, he emailed her the drawing. So he can go right into the computer and retrieve it! Which makes me wonder why they don't have all of their art work cataloged in a hard drive? I just don't get it!

Anyway, He feels that the client is being a bit overbearing, she has about 90 minutes to get this done. So he has to use his time wisely, and here he is retracing the design.
So, she's just gonna have to wait a minute! As usual, I was a bit disturbed by Mr. Duncan's behavior! You see, O'Shit is a bit sadistic and abusive when it comes to women. Just like when he was tattooing Kathy! When O'Shit isn't giving women labor pains, he is giving them tattooing pains! He stuck that tattoo needle in that woman with reckless abandon! After the torture session, the tiger looked nice! She will have to come back to get it colored in on another episode!


In the next scene, O'Shit meets up with Coley at Chocolat Restaurant and Lounge!

Apparently the daughter that they had together was a difficult pregnancy and Coley was very sick. Well Coley, having Shit in you, will make you sick to your stomach! Anyway, Lulu was born prematurely! Probably do to the stress of Coley worrying about Mr. Duncan!

Coley's father went to jail when she was young and her relationship with him ended on that note. And with that said. I am left with a very personal question about Coley. If she sees this! I so hope that she doesn't get offended! And the million dollar question is. Why does Coley look like an Avatar? I swear, the first time I saw her I said, "this chick probably talks like a dolphin!" You're not bad looking at all. And you seem to have a great attitude. I'm just saying Coley. You look like a Fairy!

 She has that whole New Age, "I believe in past lives" look to her. She must be a Buddhist or an avid pot head! Same thing! In any event, this woman has that psychotic S.A.N.D. look to her! You know S A N D? Stab A Ninja Dead!

My advice is this. O'Shit better watch his ass! I never thought I would ever say that! I just said that Shit better watch his ass!


Anyway! Now we're at Cozy's, which is some sort of Kid wonderland!  Lulu get her hair done, and they put a tiny little tiara on her head. So now she's princess Lulu! Aww! She even gets a glitter tattoo of Unicorn on her hand. She should have gotten a "daddy issues" tramp stamp! We all know that she is going to be a tragic mulatto, so lets enjoy her smiles now! One of these days we'll see her on cops in a high speed chase holding a bloody knife. (Just kidding <- - - - Had to say that for legal reasons.)

Anyway, Despite a very weak attempt at telling Lulu about his potential visit to prison.
He just couldn't do it! So, it looks like Coley will have to explain this mess to Lulu. She seems to be a pretty bright girl so, I am sure that it will go a lot better than what either parent expects! And I am sure that Lulu just sees it as being a vacation away from her slow father.


Back at the shop. Tiffany is watching over the business like the worshipful Empress that she is! In the meanwhile Walter receives a blank envelop, from a flirtatious delivery man! Watch it buddy! I don't care what kind of benifits your job has. No smiling, winking or long looks at my Tiff Tiff! Thanks in advance guys!

 Anyway, thankfully Tiffany was there to console Walter! Because he finds out that his father is in fact diseased! Walter walks out of the shop about to go get him some alcohol because the news made his body go numb! Either that, or his last drink has him numb already!

Tiffany lets him know that he needs to talk about it.  But, Walter is better with liquor and listening than he with words so. He goes outside and calls the mother of his child. So that he can listen to some worthless commentary from her. As if she will have words of wisdom or something for him. I'd think that calling a woman that you owe around 50 thousand dollars to would cause more stress. Unless he thinks that crying to her will make her have sympathy on his bank account!

Anyway, come to find out, his father didn't even receive the news that his mother passed on as well. So, now both of his parents are gone. And neither of them knew that the other died! Remember Walt when you think that you have problems! Just saying!

For the record, I was going to leave this out of my review but. When Walter was on the phone with the mother of his child. Tiffany was hugging him, and he put his arm up to her and pushed her away. I damn there kicked a hole in my screen! How could anybody, especially during a trying time like this, get a hug from an angel, and push his blessing away? That was a Tiffany Winter hug! When she walks in the room, I feel like Christmas is inside my pants. So, eat a candy caned dick Walter! Don't do that again! You need to bow down in her presents as the world should! All hail the queen!

Anyway, Walt says that he feels as if he finally has closure now and he wants for his kids to have a more positive story. He wants them to know that he is there for them 100%! Yada Yada Yada.

As I said before, it's hard to feel sorrow for villains. Just saying!


That was about it for this episode! Make sure to subscribe to my YouTube channel!
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Black Ink Crew | Season 2 | Episode 9 | Have Several Seats | Review | Recap | Opinion

Black Ink Crew | Season 2 | Episode  9 | Have Several Seats | Review | Recap | Opinion

 

(FOR THE RECORD! I will be re editing this! I am only mildly retarded! I have enough typo's in this stupid posting to be considered to be mentally challenged! I will edit later! SORRY IN ADVANCE!)

Technical difficulties delayed this review. But, better late than never!
Here is the @meetmagazine recap, review and opinion for the Black Stink, the Soap Opera without the soap! I mean Black Ink Crew, Season 2 Episode 9, titled "Have Several Seats!"


After the picnic, Tye brings Dutchess to Black Ink to get eaten by Ceaser the monster.
Ceaser is tired of being lied to by Dutchess. And Dutchess is being extremely defensive, instead of just telling the truth. She is lying dodging questions and I feel blessed to be single!

Ceaser asked Dutchess whether or not she is still in contact with Marvin. And Dutchess replies by saying, "I have no reason to talk to him". Now, I don't know how well Ceaser understands woman. But that was not a confirmation, nor was it a denial!

He asked whether or not they are talking. And she replies by saying that she has no reason to talk to him? She didn't say yes or no. So in the future if the guy pops back up and she gets caught white, cum covered handed! She can say, "well, I didn't say I wasn't walking to him. I said, that I had no reason to talk to him!"Yeah, not so slick!

Now outside, Ceaser is telling Tye about his conversation with Dutchess. And Tye lets him know that he needs to think about it like this. You should know whether or not she is cheating you, because he should know her very well. And he lets Ceaser know that he is either gonna break up with her or not!

I don't know about that one Tye. People live double lives so, it's possible for Ceaser to not have any idea of what is going on at all! All that I know is, I love Tye! He reminds me so much of 50 Cents left hand man, Tony Yayo. Tye is so hood, that whenever he pops up. I can smell the menthol cigarettes and cheap liquor in a brown paper bag through my screen! Tye is real to the 10th power!


In the next scene, we are at a mansion in Atlantic City. With Puma, Sassy, Walter Suspect Ted, some unnamed fool in a hat and some bald headed woman!  And these hood rats as expected, are ecstatic! Sassy the Grimelin's mouth, must move faster, and tear shit up quicker than Paul Walker's car! Because she was able to score Puma this six bedroom palace for them to stay in and party in, for Puma's filthy bachelor party.

Puma is so excited that he almost killed himself! He turned on the Bidet and it nearly squirted him in his face! And we all know that these people are scared of water! My favorite part of these party animals checking out the house is when Puma lays down in the Jacuzzi! I thought the only time we'd see Puma in a bath tub is during an earth quake! He proved me wrong!


After a quick toast, Ted checks his text messages and sees that Ceaser is having a crisis! He lets Puma know that Ceaser is having some issues with Dutchess and that he needs to get away! So he kindly asks Puma if it's cool to Invite Ceaser to a little time away! Puma being the cool guy that he is says yes. But forget all of that! In this scene, Puma looks the King of the Crack heads! His lips are so black and ashy, they look like chalk board erasers. Seriously Puma! How can you walk around looking like one of those, "Got Milk?" commercials?

Anyway, Ceaser shows up! With his red pocket book on! *snaps!* And before he can get inside of the mansion, Ted pulls him to the side. Ted lets Ceaser know that him and Puma need to speak because they aren't kids anymore. And as adults, they need to get over their silly differences!

And during this part of the scene, I cannot help to notice something about Ted. He needs to change his name to bed. Because he has a big ass back! He looks like he shops at, Bed Back and Beyond! His back is so big, they'd have to crucify him on bridge! Ted back is so big, if he was a super hero, he'd have to use a theater curtain as a cape!

Anyway, Sassy wants for the Puma and Ceaser to hug and kiss and make up! Which is funny because, Sassy is quite friendly with the females. Just ask Avi Berry! @avi_berry
So I guess she is trying to make everyone join the club now! Like I always say, gays don't reproduce, they recruit.

While the crew is in the house, Ceaser is acting weird as hell! He doesn't want come down the stairs and be with his friends. And this is making the get together awkward. The truth is that Ceaseer has all of that head and all of that lip! And a trip down the stairs would turn to a trip to the ER! So he's just taking his sweet pink pocket book wearing time!

Well, either his issue really  is the weight of his head and lips, or maybe he just farted? And was waiting for his shorts to air out good! I don't know!

In any even, we got a beautiful shot of puma's mouth! His mouth is playing the last tooth standing! Apparently, the tooth fairy robbed pumas mouth in his sleep, and made out big time! She took everything and the kitchen sink! I'm sure that she is retired now! She took his whole life savings! I still can't figure out how people with no teeth eat!

Anyway, back at the shop, Dutchess is drawing penises, and Tye comes by to talk to her. He has on all brown like the UPS man. But he isn't delivering boxes! When Tye gives you the box, he just popped you! BANG BANG! Trust me, Tye is straight street! Tye isn't even his real name! That's his alias! Tye is street code for, tie you up! Tye will kidnap you and tie your ass to some train tracks! I can tell!

Don't hurt me Tye! I was just saying!

The gist of this awkward scene is, Tye is letting Dutchess know that she ran Ceaser away. And that what she did was disloyal so, cut it out! Or Tye will cut her tongue out!


Now were back at the mansion. And come to find out, this mansion was used back in the 70's to shoot adult films in. And seeing that their is a bird shit stain on the window, these idiots are fantasizing about it being a streak of semen!

The inappropriate, disgusting and unnecessary behavior doesn't stop at the windows though! Ceaser and Puma are so drunk that they are hugging and about to kiss! So Sassy's fantasy just may come true. Ceaser riding a Puma! The Cock-a-dile Hunter!

Anyway, now these dorks are toasting alcohol again! And forget the drinks! Puma needs 3 shots of lotion for his elbows! Ted is so ashy, he looks like he ran through a wall like the Kool Aid man! (OH YEAH!) And puma's elbows are dryer than a nursing bra! Not to mention his lips being so white, he looks like he kissed paint! For real! Puma's lips are like Tiger Woods girlfriends. When you see em, they're always white!

What makes it worst is that Puma wants to get so drunk that he pukes in his own hair. So now we may know why he got a hair cut in an upcoming episode! But things get way worse that vomit in sideshow Bob's hair! The conversation goes into the fact that when Ceaser drinks, his inner bald headed drag queen comes out. And he starts doing his gay mating dance! Their impression of Ceasers dancing was absolutely terrible! I've seen one legged babies dance better than that!

Anyway, now it's time for Ashley and Sky to show up! And they are both horny and dressed scantly clad. My type of jumps offs! So, they are all up on Ted, like one of his tight ass shirts! And when Sky jumps on Ted's fat back. And all I can think is,"man, this chick has an odd shape!"

I tried to figure out how to describe it. She is like, many shapes in one. Like a Tri-cal-square! A triangle, a circle and a square! Come to think of it, she is shaped like the sky! She has a cloud shaped ass and some half moon shaped titties! (Excuse me while I throw up!) I don't understand why a model would have more roles than a Tyler Perry movie. The side of her stomach looks like an accordion! Step your game up Mr. Bionic back!

Ted is so suspect that he doesn't know who to choose. Sky or Ashley! Well, Sky is physically violent, she got drunk and then fought with people 6 or 7 times in the same night. And her body is shaped like a broken hour glass! Ashley on the other hand has an hour glass figure, while Sky has is shaped like a watch! Her head and legs look like the strap on the bottom and the middle is round! Seriously, she has a cute face, with a tennis racket body.

Ashley on the other hand is a dime piece. She has a cute face with perfect boobs, a slim waist and a round booty! Not to mention pretty hair, her sweet voice! And eyes that you can fall asleep while looking into! This piece of eye candy might give you diabetes! That pink dress that Ashley has on made my dick so hard, it nearly snapped! The long way!

Anyway, these two girls are going gaga over Ted. And Ceaser is hating, hardcore! Her's all poking his lips out, like a gay man at a water fountain! I mean with duck lips and a brown egg for a head. Why bring unwarranted attention to your flaws?

Anyway! Ted sent his bitches outside like dogs! And Ashley overheard them calling her KB2 or Krazy Bitch 2, with the first Krazy Bitch spot being reserved for Alexandra Estevez. Who I adore. So, all I'm gonna say is. Please leave Alexandra alone! She deserves the utmost respect, at all times, and from everyone! Just like Tiffany, she is special and off limits. Anymore insults towards either one of these gifts to the earth, will result in a tongue lashing so rough, that even Sassy would close her legs once it begins!
You've been warned!

Now we are back at the shop with Dutchess. And she is tattooing  skinny Timbaland! I mean, some fashion designer guy named Shareef! Dutchess is doing a tattoo of a geisha on his back! (How you doin) Anyway, the tattoo came out fantastic! And Shareef loves it! *snaps* Yaaaasss!


Now, we are back at the bachelor getaway. And come to find out Sky and myself are compatible.She wants to be in a polyamorous relationship. You know, like me and Tiffany Winter and Alexanda Estevez! It just makes sense! Oh well, I can fantasize all that I want!

All that I know is, if I was Ted. I would have had Sky and Ashely, synchronized already. Sister Wives on deck! And they would be happy! But that's just me. Ted has a game but, he fails to realize. That women are a business, and you gotta know how to manage your business.

Ceaser pulls Puma to the side to let him know that he deep down inside loves him like a fat kid loves cake! Like Sassy loves sitting on the washing machine during the spin cycle. Like Ted loves the baby section of the T-shirt store! Yeah!

Okay, now we are at the shop! And finally my boo Tiffany shows up! She has to wake up O'Shit from the couch, because he needs to tattoo Kathy, the mother of one of his school of children! The tattoo is a ship being led by a heart, with a knife stuck in it. On the top it says, "the love boat". The ship is in a bunch of rocky, stormy blood water!

O'Shit says that he is excited because, he gets to hurt her the way that she hurt him.
And, I don't know what the hell is talking about. We get no details about how she hurt him!

Anyway, Kathy shows up. And I am left feeling extremely confused. O'Shit feels that he is the victim in the gun in the car situation. And he appears to have no regrets about getting yet another woman pregnant. And he doesn't seem to care at all about Kathy or her feelings. It's as if he has some sort of disdain for women. Some sort of weird vendetta against them. I wouldn't be surprised if he will pop up with a domestic violence case or some other sort of violent situation. His eyes look soulless in this scene. He had that same look on his face that George Zimmerman has! You know, that whole, I don't have to tell you that I don't give a fuck, the expression on my face says it for me sort of look.

Between O'shit's odd treatment of Kathy and the disdain that he has for her. I think that she may have cheated on him because, something is not being said. Something  is missing from this story! It just doesn't make any sense! How did she hurt him? They should of have explained this in the bonus footage on the VH1 website! Oh well! It will remain a mystery for now I guess! All that I know is, after seeing this scene. Alexandra's allegations of him slipping something her drink sound very possible. Just saying!

Anyway, Kathy feels that she was at fault for letting what transpired between them  happen to her. She is growing as a person by accepting her responsibility for being with a no good guy, off and on for the past 10 years.

So, he begins tattooing her back, and I am not sure of whether or not it was the red ink or blood, but theirs red stuff all on her back! The editing job on this scene makes it look as if you are watching a scary movie! And Kathy is  screaming like she's being fucked by rose bush!

Now were Back at the Bachelor party.

Ceaser had the nerve to make fun of the dancers, when his own cockroach in dreadlocks has danced on stage too! He is making fun of their alleged body odors, their intelligence and even their occupation. At first, I was offended by what he said about these girls until I realized something.

He is with Dutchess! And no man, and I mean no man in this world who would be in a relationship with Dutchess is 100% straight! I'd question a man's sexuality just for being very attracted to her. I can see a guy being mildly attracted to her appearance. She isn't ugly, and she has a fat ass! So yeah, I get it! If you'd smash and dash, I get that too! However, calling yourself in love with her, being in a relationship with her etc. screams of desperation and or poor taste in women!

With that said. Ceasers leaves the club and no one notices nor cares. I wouldn't be surprised if that kicked him out for being underage. With that baby head and all!

Meanwhile, inside. A naked trailer park queen bounces up and down on Puma and cracks his eggs like she was trying to make eggs Bendadick! She slams her nude tail down on Pumas body hard! So hard that he fell out of his seat and hit the floor! I haven't seen something black and beaten up, holding itself on the ground since, the Rodney King beating! I guess we really can't all get along!


In our final scene, we are back at the shop, Dutchess is sitting there with Tiffany. And sweet lord Jesus, Tiffany is looking like a million dollars! As always! She must wake up looking like a movie star! Forget the "circles" I'd give her the whole Olympic logo! Seriously! If Tiffany was my woman, I'd need knee pads! My face would be her favorite chair! Recline! Just saying!

So, Ceaser walks in and he hugs Dutchess. Then the pair walk outside and have a little talk. In the confessional, Dutchess says that Ceaser needs to deal with the problem instead of running away like a little boy. She of course doesn't say this directly to him! Anyway, they basically kind of sort of forgive each other. For now! Dutchess will have Ceaser in handcuffs on some bull shit sooner or sooner! Just sit back and watch! This girl is nothing but trouble!

The episode 10 review will be up ASAP! Look out for it, and don't forget to subscribe to my YouTube channel!


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Love and Hip Hop | New York | Season 4 | Episode 6 | Wife Swap | Review | Recap | Opinion

Love and Hip Hop | New York | Season 4 | Episode 6 | Wife Swap | Review | Recap | Opinion

 

The episode starts out with Amina Peter at Amina's Apartment.

And Amina is not happy about Yandy not wanting to sign her to the new record label, Lenox Avenue. Records! #LenoxAvenueRecords

 To make matters worse, she is tired of being looked at by the public as a being the reason why Tara and Peter kind of broke up. She feels that Peter is the home wrecker, not her!  And that Yandy really let her down by psyching her up, and then not signing her over Peter not being able to control his himself!

Amina wants to Peter to act more like husband, instead of acting like a boyfriend.
You see, Peter has been sleeping at his kids house, as Amina calls, Tara's shoe sized apartment. And Pete lets her know that he is not the type of guy to wine and dine. And run bath water and light candles. In other words the opposite of me. So, Amina can get used to him not being there every night.

Anyway! The best part of this scene is when Amina lifts her arm up and you can see a bucket of sweat all on her gray jersey cotton dress! And then the back of it is soaked too! Cum to think of it, maybe it wasn't sweat at all!

Eww! Moving along.



Now were at Yumi Couture in the Fashion District of New York!
With Rashidah and Tahiry. And fat ass Rashida looks like a Ursula from the Little Mermaid! She has on an ugly dress that is Aluminum foil, silver colored, on the top and white feathery, I just lost a pillow fight on the bottom! And that was the nicest description that I could come up with!

 It looks like a swan, trying to commit suicide on an electric fence! And what makes it worse is her hair! It's long and blonde, and orange on the bottom! As if  Rapunzel got her period! But Tahiry isn't too far behind, because she is dressed like a couch! And if their is an afterlife, Tahiry is going to be covered with oil and then sent to Hell!

She told this big baked potato looking heffer, that even though she doesn't like the dress. She thinks that Rashidah is, "perfect"! I was going to make fun of Tahiry the liar and fake friend for saying this, however she wants to marry Joe Budden! So, that says everything about her that I could ever say!

Tahiry is once again taking away from Rashida's happy times to bring the attention and focus back on her selfish self! She can't be a friend to Rashidah for 1 minute without mentioning Joe Budden! She's upset because she thought that she'd be married before Rashidah. Oh well Tahiry, you wont be married before Rashidah! But you will be divorced before her! I guess we can look out for Ms. Desperate, aka Tahiry to fight for the bouquet when it's thrown at Rashidah's ratchet wedding!



Now were at W.i.P. at Hudson Square, and Yandy is chewing Rich out so badly! She wants him to find her some talent. He hasn't brought her anyone besides Erica Mena, and it's been months! Yandy told him that he is going to be an intern soon!
The best part of this scene is Yandy's costume. Yeah, not an outfit but a costume.

She has this big Honey Bun on top of her head! With some gigantic snake shaped earnings! Which have ruined her ears! Those fake heavy things stretched her ear until the bottom of her ear is now bigger than the top! Her ear now looks like K. Michelle's pussy! Anyway, she has on a  red belly shirt which reads, "RARE"! And a tight red skirt!

But hey, if Yandy wants to look like a Ghetto Geisha, that's her prerogative!  I just hope that this episode was filmed on Halloween!

I used to look at Yandy as being a very cool girl over all. I loved her drive as a business woman and felt that she had a good attitude. But after this season, I am not a fan of hers, anymore at all! I find her little belly shirt, having the word, "rare" stamped on it to be ironic. Because Yandy looks more, "basic" every episode. I now realize that Yandy is a hoodrat in a mink coat! She just has the ability to sell herself really well. She should have been a lawyer!


In the next scene, Peter takes his sons to the park to play basketball! Peter hasn't had a chance to see them very much so, he is having a ball! It seems like Peter is always having a ball, or serving balls to somebody! Anyway, then they go back to the Hispanic Honda. I mean home! Peter stays with the boys and decides to lay down. Later on when the boys are asleep. Tara comes home stumbling and drunk!

When she walks in the door, she sees Peter is on his old bed AKA Tara's couch! And this fool has his filthy feet up on it.

Now, at first I thought that I saw clumps of dirt and toe jam. But after careful inspection, what appears to be dirt. Are actually rips and claw marks from Tara trying to run away from it! Trust me, chicks can rip stuff up trying to run away from it! (Down Boy)

Peter is spending a night on the, dog bed! I mean sofa! And I am left with an important question. Does Tara usually go out and get drunk and leave the kids at home by themselves? `

Anyway, Peter lets Tara, who is wearing a white blouse, know that he wants her to lay down on that filthy outdoor furniture! He lets her know that if she lays on her back, he will stick his face in her like a lion tamer!


Tara plays hard to get, and hops up bare foot! Don't ask me why she'd walk on the ground bare foot with glass and dog shit everywhere! Anyway, Tara hoped up and walked 1 step away, to the bathroom and turned the water on and pretended that she was gonna take a shower! Then she walks out of the bathroom all wet! And not from being in the shower either! She leaves the water on full blast! And hops on on that struggle sofa with Peter, and begins mud wrestling! Geez Tara! If I ever visit, I'm getting a tetanus shot! That couch looks like it came from  a third world country! That couch obviously went to war and lost!

But Peter is the winner here! He sucked Tara's camel toe out of shape! And beat it like Jesus! I'd hate to be her neighbors or her children that night. Tara needed it badly! She was about as frustrated as Fantasia at the library!

Now we make a visit to Ursulas Salon.
K Michelle is getting her filthy fake hair done. And Paris, K. Michelle's fat manager pops up. I wanted to puke looking at her, because he neck is so fat, she looks like she swallowed a donut and it gut stuck in her throat.

K. Michelle is telling Paris that Brianna, her former assistant, that Paris hired,  did not work out. She fired the young woman. Because she was a vegetarian, and because she didn't have K. Michelle's cab on time for her after a meeting. Causing Kimberly to suffer from being stuck in the rain with her hair dye streaming down her clothing.

Brianna, stops by and attempts to make amends by bringing gifts! Brianna gives Kimberly, Gator Aid, Jack Daniels and organic dog treats! Obviously major shade! The Gator Aid implies that Kimberly will be as fat as Paris from eating that sin food, not soul food but sin food, that she is used to eating. The Jack Daniels was Brianna subliminally calling her a drunk. And finally, the dog treats were a passive aggressive way of calling her a bitch for firing her! Brianna made sure to tell her that, even though they are for her dog, she can eat them as well!

Come to find out, fat Paris and K. Michelle are scared of Brianna. Because when K. Michelle forced the vegetarian of 4 years to eat chicken. The girl cried. And then when a cab driver cursed her out the girl cried again! This scares the evil K. Michelle and donut neck Paris!

K Michelle beating her friends with flowers (MiMi), throwing candle wax on pregnant women (Rasheeda) hitting Karlie Redd in the forehead with utensils, etc. is all normal to these two trashy nasty beast.

Brianna can honestly do better. All I know is that K. Michelle wont be playing around with Erica Mena, Joseline Hernandez or Chrissy Lampkin like that. For obvious reasons. She's crazy, not stupid!



Now we are at Battery Park City in the Financial District of New York City.
Tahiry is meeting up with her sister Lexi. And Lexi looks like the girl who auditioned for a Dancehall music video, that was rejected! She looks like the Island girl that you leave stranded on the island! Her hair looks like Ramen noodles. She's wearing a faded black wife beater shirt.. And some ripped up, slashed up jeans. Looking like she survived being raped by Freddy Kruger! What makes it worst is her tattoos!

She  has more tattoos than a Yakuza! She looks like a subway train in New York. Funky, beat up, worn out and covered in graffiti! This is the nastiest looking bitch I've ever seen on VH1!

Anyway, come to find out, these 2 have not talked in 5 years. According to Lexie, their father has been kicked out of his house. And even though Tahiry speaks with her dad frequently. She didn't know because her head has been nestled inside of Joe's ass like ostrich. Which Tahiry and her family curiously look like! Anyway, after some crying and carrying on, Tahiry hops up on her transexual looking sisters lap and holds her! Eww! That's just too much fat for me for one scene! Moving along!


We make a quick visit to Washington Square Park.
Peter has so many women that when he walks up to his fake wife Amina, with a bouquet of flowers, she asks whether or not they are for her!

After Serenading Peter . Amina pulls out a box with 2 rings in it, one for her and one for him! And Peter doesn't want to wear his because, he knows that this will upset Tara. And with that said!

Amina! Peter doesn't love you. I do! That's why I'm gonna tell you the truth. You may be fine, and you may look like Aaliyah Dana Haughton. But that acne on you forehead during this scene needs immediate attention! You should pawn the rings and get some Proactive! Just saying.


In the next scene we are catching up with Tara and K. Michelle. And Tara is looking her cutest in this scene! The pipe that Peter gave her must have given her a youthful glow! No, I'm kidding! She just has a good make up job this scene! With no make up on, she looks like a little Indian boy!

The gist of this scene, inside of this Ford SUV is. Tara tells K. Michelle about what has been going on with herself, Amina and Peter. And how she ended up sleeping with him on that raggedy couch that she found on the side of the road!


Now were at Canyon Beachwear at Upper Eastside New York City.
And Erica Mena informs Cyn Santana that they will be going to Panama to do their photo shoot for Erica's book. Erica lets her know that Rich is coming with them.As corny as Rich is to Cyn, she will take one for the team and go along with it for the trip. All Erica had to do to reel her in is cover the tip of her strap on with Chipotle!


Now we have another filler scene here, at VB3 in Jersey City NJ.
Rich lets Peter know that he wants Peter to manage Erica Mena! And Peter says that Erica is beautiful! And that he will sit down and meet her. He has never meant her before so. He is down for the chance to talk with her. I think that Peter thinks that maybe, he will be able to smash and have "angry sex" with Erica Mena! If Peter Gunz gets Erica pregnant, I wont be surprised!


So, were at Washington Heights in New York City.

Tahiry and Lexi are walking down the street. Brainstorming on how they can help their father out! The sisters are going to build a church for their father to live in, and speak in! Come to find out, he is close to losing his house so this idea may save him!
Lexie suggest that they start a fund raiser and auction themselves! And honestly, I wouldn't buy them if they were free!

Tahiry is shaped like a bitten apple! So, good luck at prostituting yourself to build a church to scam poor third world country people! Their plan is  that a "fundraiser"as they call selling themselves. Will pay for his house church in no time! And this is why people hate Christianity. Just saying!

Anyway!

Now were at Yandy's Office in Brooklyn. Yandy is meeting up with a rapper named J. Dinero. So, she raps for Yandy, and she is another corny, mediocre female rapper like Loreal! No talent what so ever! And she isn't very good looking either!
J. Dinero has the same demeanor and the same lame story that Yandy has. The whole Jail bird boyfriend storyline.

If she plays her cards right, her corny, Amerie's grandmother looking ass will be on the show next week. Seeing that Yandy is all about making friends as opposed to making smart business decisions! And for the record, this funny faced chick looks like a cat wearing a wig! And that wack garbage that she rapped wont sell on any planet. So, she should  just find something else to do. Like get some head!

Seriously! She has almost no forehead! She has a little two head! Human's hairlines and eye brows are not supposed to touch!
Cat head looking mother fucker! With her gigantic hands!

Look like she can stop a train with them big hands!

The best part of the scene is when she stands up to hug Yandy before Yandy kicks her out of her office! Her out fit is horrendous! Terrible clothing is obviously something that she has in common with Yandy! She looks like a Gothic Swimmer! Must have been laundry day!



In our final scene we pay a visit to Milk River in Brooklyn.
Peter, and Amina are meeting up with Rich and Erica Mena. Thirsty Rich is trying to help Peter earn some pedicure money! As expected, the meeting with Peter and Erica went bad really fast.

Peter claims that the streets are not feeling Erica. Which Peter would of course know all about being a homeless person in all. He lives in the streets! Erica lets Peter know that he is a clown according to the streets. Blah Blah Blah!

Next thing you know, after a bit of intense arguing and too many insults to count! Erica throws a plate at Peter. To which he responds by throwing a glass. Which completely misses her! By a country mile! And I am left thinking about how these two nut cases remind me of Chris Brown and Drake! Which would make Rich Rhianna I guess! Anyway, I hope that none of those actors, I mean patrons in the background were hit with the glass! It looks like Peter should stick to aiming at ovaries! He never misses them!

Peter says that he wished to not ever be placed in the same room as Erica again, because she is disgusting. This is of course coming from a guy who has never even once in his life washed his feet. And cheats on woman after woman.I'd love to know in detail what he considers to be disgusting.

I am for the record team Erica Mena! She's just too fine!

Anyway, that was about it for this episode. Please subscribe to my YouTube channel! And drop me a comment below!

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